Before you self Harm ask yourself These Questions

For and about self harmers / people with other issues

Before you self Harm ask yourself These Questions

Postby Hash » Sun Jun 29, 2008 4:15 pm

Why do I feel I need to hurt myself?
What has brought me to this point?
Have I been here before?
What did I do to deal with it?
How did I feel then?
What I have done to ease this discomfort so far?
What else can I do that won't hurt me?
How do I feel right now?
How will I feel when I am hurting myself?
How will I feel after hurting myself?
How will I feel tomorrow morning?
Can I avoid this stressor, or deal with it better in the future?
Do I need to hurt myself?

source: ... _self.html
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Postby Abbie » Mon Jun 30, 2008 6:27 pm

This is a really useful tool, and is very like something I use with clients called the ten minute rule. It basically involves making the decision to put off self-harming for ten minutes (or less if that's all you can manage). It doesn't mean that you don't self-harm, or that you have to make the decision not to. It just means putting it off for a few minutes. This can lessen the urges, but it can also build real confidence in the idea that it doesn't have to be the only outcome to feeling the urge to harm. The time can be spent doing anything, whether it's distraction or considering the above questions. It really does work!

Abbie x
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Postby kathie » Fri Mar 20, 2009 12:09 pm

OK, am new here got addi from a helpline. I am going to try the time chunks. hopefully that way it will be productive time too. At the moment I feel as though i cant do anything until i cut. So, am gona give myself some tasks.
1 tidy hallway. 15 mins.
make coffee!
2 tidy lounge 25 mins
make coffee!
3 go to supermarket 1 hour
4 weed front garden 1 hour

probably biting off more than i can chew but will do my best. If i can just get moving and stop thinking - its sooo hard.


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Postby kathie » Fri Mar 20, 2009 2:59 pm

Ok, not doing so well. did hallway. started weeding the front garden but cant do anymore. I know there isn't anyone around at the mo and I feel a bit stupid posting to 'know one'. but stupidis normal for me! I have to get my house clean and tidy for my daughter - she is having friends for a sleep over for her birthday. How selfish of me to think its all too much effort.
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Postby Keziah » Fri Mar 20, 2009 5:40 pm

Having the plan is a really positive step. Well done on what you did achieve.
I understand the feeling on not always doing everything on the list, so I have got into the habit of writing down my lists, then when I have done something I can tick it off,which spurs me on to completing something else. I often have a reward for completing certain things - such as a cup of tea and a biscuit in front of the news in the middle of the day, or getting a newspaper to read in bed the next day, or something else that is inexpensive but makes me feel good.

Hope the sleepover goes well for you.

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