Is there anybody out there?

[Beautifully_Broken]

Hi,

It’s been a long time since anyone posted. I assume that’s becaise people have no use for this forum anymore, or have found human contact a better way of getting support rather than using the internet.

I, however seem to have regressed. I was doing okay. I had support and was doing pretty well. Things over the last year have changed though and I feel like I’ve gone back to the unstable 16 year old I was 11 years ago.

I had support in the form of my minister. Just as he announced he was leaving, I met my boyfriend. Despite my ill health I actually managed to fulfill my goal as a nurse and I graduated from uni last week. Last year my boyfriend and I got married. A couple of weeks after the wedding my husband had a seizure. Fast forward just over a year and I am my husband’s carer as he takes 25-30 seizures a day. I work as a nurse 2 days a week and the rest of the time I’m caring for my husband.

My old habits of self harm have resurfaced, but this time it’s different. This time no ones. This time I’m older. I’ve been through this before. This time no one expects me to have any problems.

We have a new minister in my church and today I told him my old habits were creeping back. I’m not sure I’ve done the right thing. I’m worried. I trust he wouldn’t tell anyone, but I’m worried that he’s going to think I’m weird.

I’m not sure what I’m writing this for this, I don’t even think there’s anyone there.

[Frodosgirl]

If you are around, I am head to listen if that would help.